...although Charlie appreciates British culture (particularly the scones) and shares a name with two members of the British monarchy (which we realized a few weeks after his birth...ha), he appreciates America's independence even more.
...And he decided the only way to FULLY celebrate his first fourth of July with gusto was to NOT SLEEP ALL THE LIVELONG DAY!!!!
And yes, Charmer shares her flags with Charlie. She's such a good big sister.
...thank you for all your words. I know that motherhood will be the hardest thing I've ever done. The hardest thing I'll ever do. Harder than wearing Tevas to middle school when only the "cool girls" wore them. Harder than landing a double lutz. Harder than passing "Mind and Brain" in college. Harder than not stuttering during my first job interview. But now I'm also aware that there are lots of people willing to lift you up when you need it.
And he makes it pretty easy to love him:
(Charlie's first scrapbook page. Copyright Two Peas in a Bucket)
He changes every day. New quirks, new noises. I can look at him and see the little boy he's going to become. And I can't wait.
(I am embracing my wrinkles. I am 30 after all. And a mother. Good God!)
I deleted my last post. I didn't mean to scare or offend anyone. Charlie is a healthy and happy and beautiful little boy and we will do whatever's best for him...I strongly believe in mother's instinct (trust me, the last two months have taught me that), and will always follow my gut. And my gut told me to delete that post.
Have a good day. Love, Laura & Charlie
The end. Not much else to say. :)
...there was a day in my life when a compliment would be, "I like your outfit" or "You look really skinny" or "God, you are so smart, Laura!"
But today I realized how much my life has changed. We took Charlie to the doctor for some congestion and had him weighed for the first time in a month. He has gained THREE pounds. And the compliment the doctor gave me?
"You're a good cow!"
Moo.
...it was a HOT date:
Charlie and Madeline June 24, 2009 - you guys didn't know it, but this was your first date. You looked at each other briefly and at one point Charlie put his hand on your arm, Madeline. (His first flirtation! Write it down in the baby book!)
You both fell asleep while your mommas ate lunch and we tip-toed out of the room to let the two of you have some alone time. Charlie woke up crying, a little scared of that thing dressed in pink next to him, which promptly started Madeline crying when Charlie's mean mommy took him away.
...this is what our life has come to. And it couldn't be any better. :)
Here is the patient. We have set up an apartment for her in the corner of our family room. The hardest thing for her so far has been the inability to beg for food. Her personality is intact, just minus the use of a rear leg.
Pet owners: we got this collar at Petco to use instead of that damn Elizabethan collar. It works like a charm, can be used also as a Boppy for Charlie, or a headrest thingy for long flights. Added bonus? If the house floods, Charmer will float!
...in recovery. The damage was just what the surgeon had expected and should be completely repaired. She is coming home tomorrow morning with lots of medicine, and to a house that has been completely adjusted for her comfort. Thanks for all your thoughts for our sweet girl. Dog people are good people indeed. :)
Nice butt shot of Charlie, right?
..."A dog has no use for fancy cars, big homes, or designer clothes. A water log stick will do just fine. A dog doesn't care if you're rich or poor, clever or dull, smart or dumb. Give him your heart and he'll give you his. How many people can you say that about? How many people can make you feel rare and pure and special? How many people can make you feel extraordinary?" Marley & Me
...Will keep you posted on how things go tomorrow.
...We finally hooked up Charlie's video monitor last weekend. If you switch the "channel" on the monitor we are picking up someone else's crib signal (like the old days of cordless phones where you would hear another conversation).
And now every time I reach for Charlie, or when I am re-swaddling him in the middle of the night, I feel the strange sense that someone is watching me. Big Brother. I half expect the swaddling police (led by Dr. Harvey Karp) to show up some morning to tell me I'm not doing something right.
...On Friday, our first-born will undergo TPLO surgery for her ACL. We hope it will make her life better in the long run. We hope she knows how much we love her. We hope we sleep on Thursday night and are not full of worry. We hope she heals well and doesn't hurt her other leg in the meantime. We hope she is back to chasing rabbits (and eventually a little boy) come fall.
If you can think about her on Friday morning, that would mean a lot.
...I look at pictures of Charlie and become painfully aware of how BIG he is getting. This was the position he assumed this afternoon when un-swaddled (and now we know why babies sleep swaddled. He must have wacked himself in the face a dozen times, waking himself up with a face that said, "Hey, who just hit me?"):
I remind myself that he's only six weeks old and he's still itty-bitty, even if the pictures make him look big. I am so hyper-aware of how fleeting everything is (maybe it's the scrapbooker in me?) - he doesn't sleep in the bassinet anymore and I just realized that I can't remember the last time he did and that makes me sad. I might just make Ken go get it out of the attic so Charlie can sleep in it again tonight. And I can take a picture of it.
But then I remember that I don't want to be that mom.
So here's what I think is a more proportional picture of Charlie. Sitting in our chair after lunch. Or mid-morning snack. Or mid-afternoon snack. Or some other time when we are up there together:
And for the record: I had no idea how much I would love him. No idea at all.
...Hate me for saying this: It isn't as bad as I expected. And that's coming from someone who is waking every two-and-a-half to three hours (generally) every night.
Yes, I'm tired, but I had no idea how the body would adjust to getting no sleep. I'm sure someday, when I'm about 50, it will all catch up with me.
I have seen some of my less-than-finer mommy moments in those wee hours though. Last night when Charlie was done eating I attempted to wipe his face with my breast pad. A few weeks ago I fell asleep while he was eating and awoke to him sucking on a part of my boob that definitely doesn't provide nourishment.
...I often wonder if every Tuesday night for the rest of my life I will remember the Tuesday night that changed us.
It's hard to fathom that he's been here for six weeks, but then again it kind of feels like he's been here forever. Maybe he has.
...and Charlie was not so sure about sharing it with that THING with the hairy hands and sharp nails:
...I spent some time today going back through my birthday cards. A lot of the folks were contacted by my mom after they appeared on my 365 blog, which has made me think back and say, "Oh sh*t, what did I write about them?" I got a card from Jay, telling me that he no longer has the mullet (thank GOD) and I got a card from Skid saying that his hair is still on fire (yikes). But the one that made me ugly cry was the very first one I opened, from my pediatrician.
With a bit of a shaky hand, he wrote, "Thank you for the honor of being Day #97 - how thoughtful and with such kind words.
It was, and is, my pleasure to serve as I am the fortunate one to have families such as yours to help.
Best wishes for a most exciting birthday and of course for the newest family member.
As always, phone for any questions and or concerns. Again and thanks and love."
I never really thought Jay, or Skid, or Howard would know what I wrote about them (good or bad) and it amazes me that they (and a lot of others) took the opportunity to write back.
..And because he's too cute to not include a picture in each post, here's Charlie's surprised face:
...What? It's not OK to take your newborn to the tanning salon?
I have to say, the most common reaction to Charlie after people say how much he looks like my father, is to remark on how tan he is.
And he is. I hold the kid up on me and I look like a whiter shade of white.
Charlie has something called breast milk jaundice. It's nothing to worry about, is most likely genetic, and isn't very common (he's one in a million!) And it gives my kiddo a rockin' tan.
...Last night, I decided to sleep for four hours and forty-five minutes. My parents have decided to keep me.
In other news, I graduated to a bigger diaper yesterday, which is so big it practically covers my nipples. But it does contain my explosive poos real good.
The end.
PS - Thank you for all the prayers for my big sister.
...Charlie reached the eight-pound mark last week so we became the ultimate yuppie-couple and tried out our Baby Bjorn. Charlie was much more interested in attempting to get milk from my button than in the actual walk itself.
My mom said I look 12 years old in this picture. The beauty of breast feeding is that I have lost all pregnancy (and more) weight. The negative is that my butt is now non-existent and there is nothing left to hold my pants up so I am constantly walking around yanking them up. I've never needed a belt before. Life really has changed.
In tug-at-my-heart-keep-me-up-at-night-in-addition-to-the-baby news, Charmer is injured. It appears she has a tear in her ACL and will need some pretty serious surgery in the coming weeks. I am told that afterward she will be like a new bionic Charmer, but the recovery will be quite painful for all of us. If you have any experience with this, let me know how it went for your dog. If you don't have experience with it, can you shoot up a little prayer for our baby girl?
